If love could have saved you, you would have lived forever.....

Well, this is the second time we've had to celebrate your birthday without you........ I think of all the things you've missed since you left so abruptly -- BB's baptism, BB's basketball, football and baseball games, LB's first day of first grade, his first attempt at sports (T-ball) ......birthdays, school programs, Easter egg hunts, Christmas trees, the pumpkin patch, and the infamous fight for the leg on Turkey day. I didn't even make parkerhouse rolls this year because you weren't here to enjoy them. (20 other people would have, but it just didn't seem the same.)

Dang it Dad, I miss you. The boys miss you. Not a day has gone by yet that they haven't remembered you in some sweet way. Like you dancing a jig in your new Scooby Doo boxers at Christmas. Or how handsome you always looked in your Sunday best. We can even remember how you always smelled by stealing a sniff from one of your old cologne bottles Grandma handed down.......

It's selfish, I know, but what I wouldn't give to have you back. You were taken so very suddenly from us......no chance for good-byes or I love you's. I guess I always thought you would live forever, even though you had been sick for 25 years. It just wasn't supposed to happen like this.

Happy Birthday Daddy. I love you. I miss you. I hope there are burgers in Heaven........

Ruled by Murphy's Law.....

Ok...I am taking a huge leap from my "ignorance is bliss" lifestyle and joining the craze. Up until a few months ago I didn't even know what a "blog" was.......now, having just spent the past two hours reading my younger sister's blog entries for the past three months, I feel inspired and intrigued by all this. I have never laughed and cried so hard in a two hour period in my life. Unfortunately, I am not quite as eloquent or entertaining as she is but, hey, I am willing to give it a shot.

Now, about the title........as I am sure time will unfold, you will see that Murphy's Law has some obsession to ruling my life. Always has. Always will. I have learned to accept this and deal with it. Doesn't mean I have to like it.

As for a little background.....I'm a 41 yr. old single mother of two boys, ages 8 and 6. We live in suburbia. Walking distance to the elementary school and church. Typical various daily activities include PTO, room mom for both boys, taxiing kids to basketball, football or baseball practice, cub scouts, play dates......and the list goes on and on. I love to spend my free time (.....did I just say I have free time??) hangin' out with my sisters and friends having our "Ya-Ya" days. I enjoy scrapbooking, cooking, and most of all my kids.
Life is good...now.

I was married at age 20 to my high school sweetheart only to be told 2 yrs. into the marriage that he was in love with someone else.....the best man from our wedding. I found myself divorced six weeks later. Never saw it coming.

So, back in 1987 you can imagine what a scandal this caused in my small town. I handled it for about 8 months before I desperately needed a change of scenery. Having always had the itch to get out of my small town, I decided it was time to go for broke. What did I have to lose? I had always dreamed of moving to New York City, so I went....much to the chagrin of my family and what few friends I had left. Amazing how something like this shows who your allies are. Anyway, I found a job as a nanny and took off. I ended up in Connecticut just about a 30 minute train ride outside NYC. Many, many stories could be told of this adventure alone, but that will be saved for another time. ;-)

Two short months after moving back East, I met the man who would start the next chapter in my life. This relationship lasted about 14 years. It was tumultuous at best. One move across the country (back to my hometown) and one restaurant adventure later, we went our separate ways in 2001.
He took all the money........I took the kids.
I won.
Next chapter........

In the past four years I have lost all my grandparents, my favorite aunt, a few friends, had my 41 yr. old brother die in my arms and most recently, last year, my father. As if this hasn't been devastating enough (did I fail to mention Murphy??), I have also been diagnosed with diabetes (severe), fibromyalgia, a heart condition, and most recently, kidney failure. This chapter bites.

So, in a much condensed nutshell, that's me (the nut). And with that all behind us, now there will be time for the fun stuff :-). As my beloved brother would say, Ozzie out....